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{February 24, 2012}   It’s Just Lunch… Or is it?

It’s Just Lunch – Described as a the #1 matchmaking service for busy professionals. I didn’t find this on Groupon or Living Social, but I thought I would write about it, just in case they run specials in various areas. The service is a national franchise, each independently owned, so each runs slightly different. I went to one in a major Midwest city and met with the director. She’s a fast talker who specializes in hard sells, so have your wallet ready. I had been contemplating trying the service for almost two years so my informational meeting quickly turned into me signing up for the service…What can I say, I liked the director.

I would say that I started off pretty optimistic. I wasn’t looking for miracles, but I knew that I needed to get out of my circle (professional school and work – both pretty competitive, so not exactly the place to flirt because I AM going to win, and men have fragile egos)  if I were to find quality dates. And because I am more family minded I didn’t want to just date for the sake of dating. Now don’t get me wrong, I am enjoying being single and I know that now is the time to live my adventures. But I have never been a one night stand, casual dating type of gal, so I would just as soon avoid that situation all together. Thus, I went in with an open-mind and pretty broad requirements. No race was excluded, my height requirement was lowered, and my age limit was expanded to 10 years older than myself.

My first date occurred at the end of January. We shall call him “L.” He was nice enough. He was late, not a huge pet peeve for me because I am constantly late myself, I just wasn’t as late as he was 🙂 What immediately irked me is, one I could tell he was the proper type, so I think it bothered him that I had ordered a drink while waiting for him. In my defense he was 20 minutes late. While waiting I had time to go freshen my makeup, have photo shoot in the bathroom mirror for the edification of my mother and sister, have a phone conversation, AND strike up a conversation with the bar tender. He made me a special martini with lavender. So yes, I ordered a drink while waiting and it was good.

Then we started talking, he was polite and immediately asked to pay for dinner. I appreciated that, I’m originally from the South with southern values, I like chivalry. He talked a lot about himself, but he might have just been filling silence, we were both nervous. I actually was pleased with the date. It wasn’t the best ever, but I left thinking that maybe if we had a second date we would have fun. My only real qualm was when he sort of dissed America. He’s French, so we were talking food and wine and he went on to say that Americans don’t know what good food is. I generally can agree what with the rise of fast food and the need for quick service. yet, he kept going Americans this, Americans that. Now I actually am quick to throw my two cents in about the American culture… It’s actually what I do research on in graduate school (well subcultures anyway). However, I do get a little patriotic when I meet someone who says they plan to live in America forever, yet have nothing good to say about it. I kept thinking, if France is so great, from their economy, to their health care, to their family values, then why are you here? It came of as pompous, he has the perfect friends, house, life, and he is better than most because he considers himself cultured. I also thought he took himself a little seriously, every joke fell flat and all he wanted to discuss was politics and economics. I kind of felt like I was being tested, like prove how smart you are to me. After a time I just let him talk and finished my drink. Despite all of this, it seemed like a congenial date and I let him have my number. I gave him a call once, but he didn’t respond so I guess I wasn’t the one.

The frustrating thing is that the coordinator’s ask for feedback, but there is no direction. They literally say, “so what’s your feedback…” When you ask specifically what they want to know they say, “just tell me what your feedback is.” It reminds me of researcher who has a scripted phone survey. If you ask them anything they just repeat the question on the script. For instance, they ALWAYS say something along the lines of “we will put you through our matching process…” If you ask for more details they can’t tell you. Not like they can’t because its private, like there is a lot of stumbling and ums and no real answer. Anyway, so I gave my feedback of L. I said he took himself too seriously, I left out my irkdome (yes I made that word up) about his American comments. I said he was a gentleman which he was, but I also said I didn’t feel any immediate spark. On to the next one…

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