saditycents











{November 6, 2017}   The Struggle is Real

Its almost 1 am and this nursing mama should be asleep instead I am awake. I can’t even say I’m wide awake, I’m just barely awake, yet there is so much to do. How does one balance it all? How do you function as CFO of our home, chef, property manager, laundress, and full-time child care provider. All while trying to eak out a semblance of a career (which has take a major back seat, I mean right now its not even in the trunk, its hitched to a trailer and holding on for dear life), lose weight, stay presentable (which means doing my hair every day) , and trying to actually interact more than just feeding  the aforementioned child. Sure teaching her French right now is a little much, but I also don’t want her just staring at the ceilings between feedings and diaper changes. How do you accomplish it all? Right now it doesn’t feel like anything can be dropped. Don’t manage the finances and rental property? Don’t prepare whole food meals for the family? Don’t do laundry?

The go to answer is have your husband help more. But if he is already extremely helpful between classes and work and taking on a major portion of the cleaning all while dealing with Uncle Sam on a daily bases what more can you ask before you both are overwhelmed? Right now my solution is that I overload myself to keep from overloading him. It seems like men can’t handle stress at the level women can. I don’t know if there is an answer. There’s just the question at one in the morning. How do you balance it all? The struggle is so real.

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{October 17, 2017}   REPOST: The BMI Truth

“1. The person who dreamed up the BMI said explicitly that it could not and should not be used to indicate the level of fatness in an individual…

3. It is physiologically wrong…

9. Continued reliance on the BMI means doctors don’t feel the need to use one of the more scientifically sound methods that are available to measure obesity levels.”

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=106268439.

https://academic.oup.com/ije/article/43/3/665/2949550/Commentary-Origins-and-evolution-of-body-mass



One word… Newborn

Yep, if you want to be stressed beyond belief and determined to cry on more than one occasion (even make your veteran husband want to cry), request a month long extension on your final out, get denied (despite a verbal approval) and be forced to move with a newborn.

Our trip should have taken 12 hours, 700 miles straight through. We decided to drive half way and spend the night. Under normal circumstances that would mean 6 hours a day, we figured with a baby that would mean a few more hours. We did not anticipate nearly double the time. Twelve hours to drive 350 miles… It was a looong trip.



Seriously this is about to be my slogan. I am blessed that this week I have had many random and not so random people help me and I am so thankful!
 
1. At the pharmacy, I went in to grab one thing and ended up buying several things (you know how it is). First, the store gave me free bags (they charge per bag where I live), because I didn’t intend to need a bag. Then the manager carried my stuff to the car so I wouldn’t have to juggle the baby and my purchases. Thanks Walgreens!
 
2. At the Chinese restaurant I ordered a meals to go. I told the cashier I was going to sit in the car with the baby and I would be back to check on the food. “Don’t worry about it, I’ll bring the food out to you.” Thank you!
 
3. My sister wakes me up for important appointments, knowing I sleep at random hours now. Thanks Sissy Charity Moore.
 
4.Finally, my husband insisted I take a nap while he took care of the baby, did laundry, and cleaned… just because (hence why I’m awake at 3 am LOL). Thanks Dadrick Johnson.
 
There were even more acts of kindness that I’ve appreciated. These are just a few. I can’t help, but think other moms could use the same help…
So, have you helped a mom today?


Mommy and Daddy decided to give my first festival a try, complete with fireworks but that didn’t exactly work out how we planned. 

Everything was going great. We walked along the water and enjoyed the sights and sounds. 


Just as we found the perfect spot to watch the fireworks display something happened…

That half-decaf latte mommy had earlier kicked in; I didn’t mean to, it was a complete accident. Daddy lifted me so I could see the water and well, a wave of a different sort broke through, all over his white cargo shorts!

Needless to say we ended the night early and missed the fireworks. I guess we’ll try again next year. 😦

It was a long night!



“Twizzle Twazzle Twozzle Twum, Time for this one to come home.” There used to be an old cartoon that featured “Tootle the Turtle.”

Tootle Turtle

Tootle would always get himself into all sorts of scraps in alternate worlds and on adventures and Mr. Wizard would summon him home. Well that time has finally come home for us. My husband has served in the US Air Force for twenty years. For us that means, he is retiring and we are re-entering the civilian world. Mr. Wizard was always trying to teach Tootle that he was best off and safest in the comfort of home. While I admire the lesson, I don’t know if we are ready to fully embrace it. We are leaving the military; my husband after 20 years of service, me after almost 30 years as a dependent. Yet neither one of us are mourning. We are excited for our next adventure. In the mean time, of course I will provide resources for this transition.

To start off: Here are few tips when deciding how you will move and what you are entitle to for the final PCS:

    1. Who should we see before retirement? There are some mandatory appointments that the service member must attend before the final out processing is complete. However, you’d be surprised at how few spouses think to go to those appointments as well. So far we have been to about five appointments and/ or classes and I am always the only spouse. If you can’t accompany your service member through all of the TAPS process at least go to these classes and meetings:
      • Survivor Benefits Plan – There is a face to face meeting that requires both of your signatures. If your SBP counselor doesn’t insist on your presence, insist on  it for yourself. You want to be able to ask all of your questions because the SBP is a one shot deal. Once the paperwork is signed its hard to undo. Granted you have to give your consent to be cut out to of the plan, but you may have other questions about remarriage after death, protection for future children, etc.
      • Boots to Business Lecture- Even if you are not sure you want to start a business. Its good to know your options. There are so many programs out there to help veterans and their military spouses start businesses that you should really just take advantage of good information.
      • 10 Steps to a Federal Job – This is a great job for both members of a military couple. Often retirement can mean a change in dynamics. Spouses who haven’t worked in a long time, may consider full-time employment now that moving every few years isn’t a factor. Federal employment is always a consideration. It’s the closest you will get to a military career, and for some veterans and spouses that is comforting.
      • Budget portion of TAPS – In many military families the spouse takes care of the finances because they are the consistent partner on the home front. Thus, its so important that spouses get involved in the transition budget portion of transition training. One, so you can help fill any gaps on your existing budget and financial plan. Two, because its your future too. Don’t leave your service member to create a mock budget that has no relevance to your real life. Take the help and make your budget as realistic as possible. It may be difficult to get advice later.
    2. What entitlements are available to me?Separating or Retiring Military Service Members

      Are you separating or retiring from service? Read more on what you need to know regarding your travel claim at the end of your military service. You are authorized the following entitlements:

      Monetary Allowance in Lieu of Transportation (MALT)
      Plus (Per Diem)
      Dependent Travel
      Personally Procured Moves (PPM)
      Advance Payments

 

  1. Where will the military pay to move me? If you are,
    • SEPARATING: You must complete your travel before the 181st day (6 months) after your Separation Date on your orders. And, your travel is limited to your Home of Record (HOR) or your Place Entering Active Duty (PLEAD)
    • RETIRING: You must complete your home of selection (HOS) travel one year from the retirement date on your orders. Your travel is not limited to your HOR or PLEAD. You may claim travel to any location within the U.S. you are planning to reside after retiring
  2. How long am I entitled to military pay or a military move after retirement?
    • According to the regulation that governs military travel, your final move must be made within one year of your retirement, unless you apply for and receive an extension.
  3. How much can we make if we move ourselves verses have the military move us? PPM or DITY moves are known for making the service family money. But this may not always be the case because there’s no set rule that you will make money. Instead you make the best decision base on the information. Here are some resources to help make that decision:

 

Resources:

https://www.dfas.mil/militarymembers/travelpay/armypcs/endofmilitaryservice.html

http://www.belvoir.army.mil/jppsoma/files/FAQ/retirement%20entitlements%20info%20paper.pdf

http://www.military.com/spouse/military-life/retiring-from-military/qb-how-long-does-a-retiree-qualify-for-a-final-pcs.html



{January 18, 2017}   Christmas in Big Sky Country 



{November 4, 2016}   Voting

A cute post about the importance of voting during this election season.

Charity Is Blog

We always take the kids with us when we vote. This year was no exception for early voting.

Me: Ladybug our current president is President Barack Obama. Today we’re voting for a new president.

Ladybug: …another guy?

Me: Today we’re voting for a girl.

Ladybug: Like me?

Me: yes, like you!

Ladybug:With curly hair?

Me: Maybe next time…

Our kids need role models in all walks of life. They notice when they are and aren’t represented, regardless of their age.Our Politics, Presidents, Senate and House should look like our country; diverse. Go vote!

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{September 26, 2016}   Military Wife Life: The Song

This is kind of a movie review and a post in one. I rarely attempt to give anything even resembling relationship advice on this blog, but I just loved this movie so much. 

The movie follows a musician and his marriage. I don’t want to give spoilers, but you can guess that there are temptations he has to challenge as married musician. What I love about the movie is that there are so many facets. My husband and I just finished watching it a second time in preparation for a marriage Bible study we will be facilitating and I still found new layers. This is refreshing because so many Christian movies are over simplistic in their views on love and life. 

Let’s be honest, marriage isn’t clear cut. I listed this under military wife because I could see how the same struggles of a touring musician could effect a military family. It’s not just the temptation to cheat, but the strain of long separations; as a spouse building a life without your service member when they are gone, then the struggle to reincorporate them back into your life. 

The movies highlighted a lot about choices. I see it a lot on base. Spouses who make their whole world about being a military spouse. I talk about it a lot on this blog, but that is because it’s really inappropriate to talk about my career as an attorney.  So I discuss home life. But in real life there are spouses who can’t relate if you aren’t talking about being a military spouse or a mother. This is not to condemn anyone, but when our self inflicted identities take precidence over our marriages can they survive?

I told you the movie was deep! Anyway so, I encourage you to watch it and if you’re so inclined do the Bible study or devotional. 



Are you a child-free military spouse? Here’s our tips for surviving the military life without kids.

Source: How to Survive the Child-Free Military Life | SpouseBuzz.com



et cetera